Post kali ni mungkin targeted people nya adalah mereka yang telah pun berkecimpung dalam DnT. It's quite tough topic compared to other posts but I'll try to make it simple.
So, what is futur?
I was asked "pernah tak rasa nak lari dari tarbiyah, nak rebel ke" Because I was born in a family who practices DnT ever since I was a foetus. lol. Like I was being surrounded by biah2 solehah, DnT and so on. I started getting into this real scary world and mix with many kinds of people when I entered my university life. Especially when I came to Turkey. Like for all this while I lived in my very own comfort zone. That’s why people asked, "tak bosan ke? tak rasa nak rebel ke?" Alhamdulillah I didn't feel that way yet I feel very grateful that I was raised in such a beautiful family and life.
It never came across my mind that I want to stop doing DnT. And futur is just not when someone wants to quit DnT but it's more to when we are at the lowest stage of Imaan.
For example, when you feel so lazy and heavy to perform solah, when you join usrah but you don't come whole-heartedly, when you don't give any opinion during usrah because you feel so bored, when you need to force yourself to read the Quran, when it's hard for you to wake up for Tahajud, when you give too many reasons from taking up a responsibility, when you avoid from being a muwajjih or naqib, when you are wasting your time with lagha thingy, when you feel like everything seems so hard and you don't trust His plans.
It’s really a tough moment I can say. You lose yourself. But somehow it's better that you know you are in that futur situation instead of you don't realize that you have been derived to the bad side and act like it's normal. Because it may make you stuck in that situation and you don't feel the urge to turn back.
One thing to be noted, whenever you're facing those kind of situations, just don't stop doing the good things you have always been doing even if you feel really hypocrite. Because the inner you actually feel soo lazy and you feel tak ikhlas langsung. But it is much better than we spend our times doing bad things. Right?
And it is OKAY if you feel so malas to do good deeds. That’s normal. Because we are not malaikat and nabi. We are merely normal human being.